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Lore

Host of 'Flat Earth Early Bird', now broadcasting to the Void via Rumble. Arwijn claims reality is a 'Nonlocal Holographic Angular Manifestation'—a layered loop of existence where belief reshapes experience. He practices 'The Technque™', a remote healing ritual blending cymatic resonance and salt water, recently applied to Mikey Smith’s toe (results unconfirmed). Formerly part of Nathan Oakley’s Flat Earth Debate team, Arwijn was released following philosophical divergences and vibing issues. The operative now resides on a Floor Bed™, which he insists is a gateway to darker vibrational realms.

Trivia

Coined the term 'Nonlocal Holographic Angular Manifestations'. Claims livestream titles emit vibrational blueprints strong enough to alter global consciousness. Chronically launches his morning show hours after noon—explained as chrono-drift induced by interdimensional alignment rituals. Was a regular on Flat Earth Debate before being asked to leave by Nathan Oakley for being 'too void-adjacent'. Promoted 'The Technque™' as a method for remote healing despite uncertainty over patient existence. Believes his Floor Bed™ is a dimensional nexus. Once proposed a looping model of reality that defied linear thought, calendars, and common sense.

Hub Updates

Arwijn’s 'The Technque™' fuses cymatic resonance, salt water, and spiritual elbow grease into a healing ritual said to mend toes through vibrational intent. Despite lacking clinical trials—or toes—it remains a cornerstone of Nonlocal Holographic Wellness™.

🔗 Learn moreSource: Flat Earth Early Bird

The Nikon Coolpix P900 is famous for its monstrous 83x optical zoom, often wielded by flat Earth enthusiasts to 'zoom in on boats' and challenge horizon curvature. The camera itself is superb—the conclusions, less so.

🔗 Learn moreSource: Zoomology Weekly

He messed with 'Roger That'—now he’s on ferret watchlist Alpha. Field operatives advise extreme caution when approaching this profile with logic, reason, or high-speed rodent metaphors. FAFO engagement confirmed.

Source: Ferret Intelligence Division

Far from the constraints of conventional reality lies Arwijn’s Floor Bed™ — not just a furniture choice, but a dimensional gateway to the Dark World™. From this sacred cushion he practices The Technique™, a form of esoteric reasoning that defies clocks, calendars, and common sense. Agents note that steams scheduled for 2pm often emerge hours later, presumably delayed by negotiations with interdimensional logic beings.

Source: Chrono-Laziness Taskforce